History
In 2003 I attended Amplifying Your Effectiveness, an innovative annual conference in Phoenix designed around experiential learning. The last session, “Reflection Leading to Action”. was facilitated by software and team management consultant Esther Derby. Esther had us reflect about our experience at the conference, about what we might want to happen in our lives as a result, about how we might go about making changes, about how we would know we were successful, and about how we would get support. Her questions helped us to focus on what we had learned at the conference and what we could commit to changing in our life as a result.
I found Esther’s session valuable, and adapted it into what I now call a personal introspective, a session I include near the end of all but the shortest of the peer conferences I facilitate.
What
happens at a personal introspective?
A personal introspective is a peer conference session where, to start, attendees privately answer the five questions listed at the start of this section. These questions offer attendees an invitation to think about what they have experienced at the conference, how their experiences may impact their life in the future, and what changes they may want to make as a result. After five to ten minutes of reflection, each attendee, in turn, is given the option to share their answers with the entire group.
Purpose
The fundamental purpose of a personal introspective is to give attendees a chance to explore changes they may want to make in their life and work as a result of their experiences during the conference. Each attendee is free to respond at whatever level he finds appropriate and comfortable at the time. Some people come up with ideas for small changes in their lives, while others come to profound realizations that have significant consequences. At first glance, the space and time provided for answering these questions is another peer conference tool that attendees can use as they see fit. Practically, at the personal level, the personal introspective is a significant process and opportunity that a peer conference offers to each attendee.
If this service was all that a personal introspective provided, then, in the words of the Jewish Passover song “Dayenu”—It would have been enough. But the subsequent sharing by attendees adds more to the personal introspective, which becomes a vehicle for creating a heightened sense of connection and intimacy amongst group members. It can feel risky to share with others what are often intimate aspects of the changes one wishes to make in ones life, and it can feel risky to share the decisions one has made to start work on such changes. Taking such risks is an integral step on the path of building intimacy—not only the increased intimacy that the sharer feels, but also the group’s connectedness as more and more people share. In a safe environment, the outcome is increased trust, which further builds safety.
By sharing with the group, an attendee deepens his commitment to carrying out the goals and actions that he shares.
The
five questions
The personal introspective questions I use are based on Derby’s, which in turn derive from the concept of SMART goals outlined in management consultant Peter Drucker’s 1954 classic, “The Practice of Management.” SMART is a mnemonic that is most commonly described as standing for Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant, and Timely goal characteristics. Stressing these qualities when fashioning personal goals helps attendees avoid impractical plans and activities.
The first question, “What do I want to have happen?”, helps an attendee focus on his future plans and actions, as shaped by his conference experience. It makes explicit the start of the attendee’s transition away from the intensity of the conference back to his normal work or life routine. The question suggests others: “What has struck me during my conference experience?”, “What new ideas do I want to take back, to foster and nurture after the conference is over?”, “What changes might I want to make in my life and work?” This question is asked first to encourage an open-ended big picture approach to change.
The second question, “What is the current situation?”, brings the attendee’s attention back from his future goals to the present, inviting him to summarise where the attendee is now. This is an important question, one which grounds him in his current reality.
The first two questions define the starting and potential ending points of the attendee’s future journey. The third question, “What am I willing to do?”, invites the attendee to plan the practical actions that will take him from where he is now to where he wants to be in the future. The inclusion of “willing” in the question guides the attendee towards a response that he can commit to.
The fourth question, “How will you know when it happens?”, checks whether what the attendee wants to happen is measurable in a way that has meaning for him. The emphasis here is on the process he uses to choose what to measure rather than what he chooses to measure. Without measurable actions and outcomes, the attendee won’t know how to manage the process of change, gauge his progress towards his goals, or know when he’s succeeded—a sure recipe for frustration.
The fifth question, “Where and how will I get support?”, encourages the attendee to create a list of potential resources that he can use to support his plans for change. If these resources include people at the conference, he can touch base with them before the conference ends.
The
value of a personal introspective
I continue to be surprised by the power of the simple process of a personal retrospective. Not for everyone who participates, for sure, but at every session I have run, a number of people have, emotionally, publicly announced how important the exercise was for them. In peer conference evaluations, typically about 60% of attendees rate personal retrospectives “high”, 35% “moderate”, and 5% “low.” Giving people the opportunity to come together, process, and then share their experiences and realizations generates a sense of connection and intimacy amongst attendees that needs to be experienced to be believed.